if it rains this weekend, causing us not to be able to ride for this motorcycle safety class…
i will be livid!
with all the other and constant shit going on, that’ll be my breaking point.
i don’t care if it rains the rest of my vacation. the weather needs to be good on both saturday and sunday so i can do this class and pass and get my license because i can always ride my bike legally another day, goddamnit!
this class ain’t refundable and i am not waiting a whole more year. my bike has been sitting for too long and i need some good in my life right now.
JUST LET ME HAVE THIS ONE THING!
i am officially on vacation!
sure, it’s a staycation but no work for nine fucking glorious days!
i am i serious need of peace. my life has been completely turned inside out and i have no sense of direction anymore.
i took a big step forward a few months ago by moving out on my own and now that’s gone and i feel like i have taken twenty steps back.
i feel like i can’t do anything right in my life. that i’m still this damn fuck up.
i’m tired of crying myself to sleep every night and then waking up later do to my overthinking and loud mind.
i need to sleep. deep, deep sleep.
i want quiet and calm and some clarity.
my motorcycle class is next week… the same week my period should start.
i have been so anxious about it because when it’s my time of the month, it is all kinds of fucking hell.
(excruciating painful cramps and heavy flow and all the other shit)
there would be no way for me to participate in my safety class which means money wasted and having to wait an entire year to get licensed.
well, i woke up this morning and there it was a couple of days early. this means it’ll be nearly over when class starts.
i have never been this excited about getting my period in my entire life!
and out of all the things i have been praying for lately, this is the only damn thing that gets answered.
ain’t that some shit!